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OPINION

Swapping the handshake for a fistbump

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I still remember the day my dad taught me about the importance of a handshake.

I was probably 9 or 10, and was riding with him in the front seat of our Plymouth Fury with a push-button transmission. I could tell from the tone of his voice that he felt like what he was telling me was important, so I paid attention.

“Your handshake has to be firm,” he told me. “Not so much that you crush the other guy’s hand, but nobody likes shaking hands with a dead fish. And, always look the other man in the eye when shaking his hand.”

The advice has served me well. Many friendships over the years have started with a hearty handshake. It’s a safe, acceptable way to make a physical connection with somebody you don’t know.

Well, we used to think it was safe.

The most common theory is the handshake was started as a way to show strangers that you were unarmed. By pumping the hand up and down, you could tell if there was anything hidden up their sleeves.

According to the website History.com, the first depiction of a handshake dates to a relief from the ninth century BC showing Assyrian King Shalmaneser shaking hands with a Babylonian ruler to seal an agreement between the two leaders.

As the ancient relief demonstrates, handshakes have long been a way to finalize an agreement. Even today, fans of American Pickers know it’s not a deal until you shake on it. Once you do, you can’t go back without breaking your word.

By the 70s, my friends and I had discarded the traditional handshake for the one we saw used by NBA players, with interlocking thumbs and cupped hands. It was another way for our generation to separate from our parents, and to rip off black culture.

That simple alteration of the handshake has evolved into elaborate routines that resemble well-choreographed games of pat-a-cake. It seems that we’ve taken the handshake about as far as it can go.

These days, handshakes are just too risky. Elbow bumps have to suffice for those occasions when physical contact is needed. But more often, we just smile and nod at each other from a safe distance.

The handshake may be getting a bum rap. A 2011 study of 5,209 handshakes during a college graduation found only one incident of a pathogen being transmitted.

Dr. David Bishai of the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health explained that the highest bacteria counts on our hands are in the moist parts between the fingers and under the nails, which you don’t normally come in contact with during a handshake, according to a 2017 story on the Business Insider website.

That same story noted that high-fives are twice as safe as a handshake, and fistbumps are ten times as safe.

I’m not sure what the etiquette is for a fist bump, and that’s probably a good thing.

Like a lot of the lessons passed down by my dad in the 1960s, there was an element of sexism to his advice. A firm handshake is the sign of strength and vigor. A weak handshake led to suspicions that the person may be weak as well.

My dad was preparing me for the world that existed at the time. But even then, the handshake had long outlived its original purpose. It’s a lot easier to hide a pistol than a broadsword.

The fistbump seems like a more appropriate greeting these days.

Walt Rubel can be reached at waltrubel@gmail.com.

Walt Rubel, handshake, social distance

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