The chemistry of a second chance

Nicola Roath sits in college science classes surrounded by students nearly half her age, listening carefully, taking her time and refusing to rush through the second chance she once never imagined she would have.

For Roath, education is no longer simply about earning a degree. It is about redemption. It is about understanding the chemistry of addiction that shaped so much of her own life. And it is about finding a way to help others survive it.

“I see this scholarship not just as financial assistance, but as a vote of confidence in my potential,” Roath said after being named one of this year’s Live Your Dream Award recipients by Soroptimist International of Las Cruces. “I am committed to using the funds responsibly and purposefully to advance my education and prepare for a career where I can contribute meaningfully to my community and profession.”

That potential was not always easy for her to see in herself.

Roath grew up in Socorro, where she would eventually raise four children while living through what she now openly describes as years of addiction, trauma and instability. Methamphetamine addiction consumed much of her adult life, stretching across years she now views with both honesty and reflection.

“I suppose I convinced myself at some point that it was self-medication,” she said. “I had just told myself that I can mess around until I’m 50 and I’ve got to stop doing it by the time I’m 50.”

But life rarely follows the timelines people set for themselves.

Roath’s second husband — a military veteran much older than she was — died during the COVID era after ongoing health problems. Their daughter, Maya, was still very young. Suddenly, Roath found herself balancing grief, motherhood and the growing realization that her life could not continue on the same path.

For a time, she worked as a manager at Blake’s Lotaburger in Socorro. She had already completed an associate’s degree in psychology through an online program while living in the remote desert between Bernardo and Mountainair, an isolated stretch of New Mexico landscape where she and her husband had attempted to live sustainably off the grid.

But addiction still lingered beneath the surface. Then came sobriety. Not the dramatic, cinematic kind. The quieter, day-by-day kind.

Roath entered recovery programs that rewarded clean drug tests with small financial incentives. The rewards themselves were modest, but she said the structure mattered. So did the realization that life, once the chaos disappeared, suddenly felt still.

“I had been clean for like four or six months, and I was just like, this is boring,” she said with a laugh. “I don’t want to do this for the rest of my life.”

That moment became a turning point. Rather than return to old habits, Roath began asking herself a different question: What did she actually want her life to become?

The answer led her back toward science.

“I’ve always been interested in the brain,” she said. “It’s always seen a cross between the brain and the body.”

Today, Roath is studying biochemistry at New Mexico State University with plans to eventually attend graduate school and pursue research into plant-based medicine and addiction recovery. Her goal is deeply personal — finding ways to simplify and improve treatment methods for people struggling with dependency.

She remembers spending hundreds of dollars years ago on complicated detox programs and overwhelming combinations of supplements that became impossible to maintain.

“It would be nice to simplify that down to like one or two,” she said.

Her interest in recovery science is rooted not only in chemistry, but in empathy.

“As a person in recovery, Nicola is pursuing a career in natural medicine and scientific research, with the goal of helping others navigate addiction through compassionate, evidence-based approaches,” her scholarship biography states.

The road back has not been simple.

Roath lives primarily on survivor benefits from her late husband’s Social Security and scholarship assistance while attending school. She moves through her coursework deliberately, resisting the pressure to overload herself the way many younger students do.

“I want to make sure I know what I’m doing,” she said. “This is the basis of everything else that I’m going to be learning.”

What surprises her most is not the difficulty of the coursework. It is discovering she is capable of more than she once believed.

“That I can do a lot more than I think I can,” she said quietly.

Her daughter Trinity, now 19, has become one of her biggest supporters. Roath said their relationship remains especially close, shaped in part by the years they endured together.

Recognition through the Live Your Dream Award has added another layer of affirmation.

“It’s an amazing feeling to be recognized for what you’ve been through,” she said. “And it kind of makes it all worth it.”

For Soroptimist International of Las Cruces, stories like Roath’s are exactly why the organization continues investing in women pursuing education while carrying the responsibilities of family, hardship and recovery.

The Live Your Dream Awards support women who serve as the primary financial providers for their families while working toward educational goals. The program offers assistance not only for tuition and books, but also for transportation, childcare and emergency expenses that often derail students trying to rebuild their lives.

This year’s recipients faced challenges ranging from homelessness and violence to addiction and poverty. Yet each woman chose to continue forward.

Roath’s path may be rooted in science, but in many ways her story is about something simpler.

Hope. Not abstract hope. Earned hope.

The kind that is built slowly in classrooms, recovery meetings, scholarship applications and ordinary days where a person simply keeps going.

And somewhere between Socorro, the desert outside Mountainair and a biochemistry classroom at New Mexico State University, Nicola Roath found hers.